Laugh out loud with our assortment of secretary jokes. From amusing workplace mishaps to clever quips, these jokes celebrate the unsung heroes at the heart of every successful office.
Office life can be a real hoot! Explore our secretary jokes and discover the lighter side of filing, meetings, and memos.
Secretary Jokes Office
1. Why did the secretary wear glasses to work? Because she couldn’t see the point of coming in.
2. What did the boss say to the secretary on her first day of work? “You’re hired. But just to be clear, that doesn’t mean you can’t be fired.”
3. What do you call a secretary who can type over 100 words per minute? A magician.
4. Why do secretaries always have their phones on silent? Because they’re tired of hearing the same requests over and over again.
5. How many secretaries does it take to change a light bulb? Just one, but it will take her five minutes to find the right form.
6. What do you call a secretary who has mastered the art of multitasking? A superhero in heels.
7. Why did the secretary keep putting her hand over the receiver when talking on the phone? Because her boss was constantly yelling at her.
8. How do you know when a secretary is having a bad day? When her filing cabinet becomes her personal punching bag.
9. Why did the boss ask the secretary to work overtime? Because he needed someone to make him a cup of coffee at midnight.
10. How does a secretary get through a boring meeting? By imagining her boss wearing a clown nose and a tutu.
11. Why do secretaries always have to remind their bosses about upcoming deadlines? Because their bosses are too busy trying to figure out how to avoid them.
12. How can you tell if a secretary is overworked? When she starts speaking in acronyms that even her boss can’t understand.
13. What’s the difference between a secretary and a human filing cabinet? A human filing cabinet actually gets paid.
14. How can you tell if a secretary has been at her desk too long? When she starts answering the phone with, “Hello, this is my home now.”
15. Why did the secretary bring a pot of soil to work? Because she heard her boss wanted a “plant manager.”
16. How many secretaries does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, they just tell their boss to do it.
17. Why do secretaries always seem to know where everything is? Because they’re secretly keeping a mental map of the office to plot their escape.
18. How do you know when a secretary is angry? When she starts calling her boss by his first name, followed by a four-letter word.
19. What did the secretary say when her boss asked her to work on a Sunday? “Sure thing, boss. And while I’m at it, would you like me to iron your shirt and shine your shoes?”
School Secretary Jokes
20. Why did the school secretary always carry a ladder? She was always reaching for the top!
21. What do you call a school secretary who can play the piano? A typist!
22. Why did the school secretary bring a pen to the beach? In case she needed to take attendance!
23. How did the school secretary become a millionaire? She worked at the school for a billion years!
24. What do you call a school secretary who can fix anything? A “desktop repair technician!
25. Why did the school secretary become an artist? She wanted to master the art of organizing chaos!
26. Why did the school secretary bring a broom to work? To sweep away any potential problems!
27. How does a school secretary greet each day? With a big smile and a “file” of positive energy!
28. Why did the school secretary win the award for best multitasker? She keeps her desk tidy and her schedule busy!
29. Why do students love the school secretary? Because she’s the keeper of all their educational secrets!
30. Why did the computer ask the school secretary for advice? It knew she had a knack for organizing things!
31. What is a school secretary’s favorite type of music? Classical- because it’s very “noteworthy”!
32. Why did the school secretary open a bakery? She’s great at handling “office” supplies!
33. How did the school secretary greet visitors? With open arms and a well-organized appointment book!
34. What do you call a school secretary who always has a solution? A “problem-solving” expert!
35. Why did the school secretary become a detective? She could always track down missing paperwork!
36. Why did the school secretary become a librarian? She loves keeping everything in order!
37. What is a school secretary’s favorite type of math? Accounting, because it all “adds” up!
38. Why did the school secretary become a comedian? She has a talent for organizing laughter!
Boss Secretary Jokes
These boss secretary jokes are a secret to surviving the workday! Join us for a laugh and enjoy some administrative amusement.
39. What do you call a secretary who steals your office supplies? A pen-thief-er!
40. Why did the secretary bring a ladder to the meeting? Because she heard the boss wanted to discuss “climbing the corporate ladder.”
41. Why did the boss always hire secretaries who were good at math? Because he wanted someone to keep his “balances” in check.
42. How do you know when the boss is having a bad day? When he asks his secretary to file the paperwork in the circular file (the trash can)!
43. Why did the secretary always have a map on her desk? Because she wanted to show the boss that she could navigate through any situation
44. Why did the secretary bring a backpack to work? Because she heard the boss wanted someone who could “carry the load.”
45. Why did the boss and secretary always play chess during lunch breaks? Because they enjoyed making strategic moves together.
46. Why did the boss tell his secretary not to worry about the broken photocopier? Because he wanted to see if she could handle “copycat” problems.
47. Why did the secretary bring a plant to the office every day? Because she wanted to make sure there was some “growth” in the company.
48. What did the boss say when his secretary asked for a day off? “Sure, take the day off. Who will do all the work while you’re gone? Oh, wait…”
49. Why did the boss and secretary take a road trip together? Because they wanted to see if they could “navigate” the challenges outside the office.
50. Why did the secretary always carry a dictionary? Because she liked to “define” her role clearly.
51. Why did the boss compliment his secretary on her keyboard skills? Because he knew she could type her way to success.
52. Why did the secretary bring a suitcase to work one day? Because she wanted to show the boss that she was always ready for a “workcation.”
53. Why did the boss always ask his secretary for advice? Because he knew she had a knack for “secret-arial wisdom
Company Secretary Jokes
From coffee runs to conference calls, our secretary jokes cover it all. Get ready to punch in for a dose of office hilarity!
54. Why did the company secretary get locked out of his office? Because he misplaced the keys to the shareholders’ kingdom.
55. How do you know if a company secretary is good at their job? When their paperwork is as pristine as their suit.
56. Why do company secretaries make such great event planners? Because they’re experts at taking minutes!
57. Why did the company secretary cross the road? To get to the other side of the annual report.
58. How does a company secretary make a decision? They have a board meeting with themselves.
69. Why did the company secretary refuse to join the board game? Because they couldn’t stand the thought of being stuck with the same board for the rest of their life.
70. What’s the difference between a company secretary and a secretary bird? One wears a suit and the other has wings.
71. How does a company secretary relax after a long day of work? By reading the fine print on their shampoo bottle.
72. Why did the company secretary join the debate team? Because they love arguing for the minute.
73. Why do company secretaries hate taking days off? Because they know their emails won’t take care of themselves.
74. Why did the company secretary need to see a doctor? To get a shot of minute-treatment.
75. Why do company secretaries always seem so calm? Because they’ve mastered the art of maintaining corporate composure.
76. How many company secretaries does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They have a standing policy on keeping everything in the dark.
77. Why did the company secretary fail to reach the top of the corporate ladder? They got stuck at the bottom of the meeting minutes.
78. Why do company secretaries always bring their lunch to work? To ensure they never waste a single minute.
79. What do you call a company secretary who works too much? An over-minuted executive.
80. Why did the company secretary write a book? To share their secrets to taking good minutes.
81. How does a company secretary stay calm in the face of chaos? By remembering that the meeting will still start on time.
82. Why did the company secretary get a tattoo of the company’s logo? So they can take their job with them wherever they go.
Silly Secretary Jokes
Unlock a treasure trove of office humor with our collection of secretary jokes. Get ready to LOL and type away your stress!
83. Why did the secretary bring a ladder to work? She wanted to see the top of her to-do list!
84. Why did the secretary always have a vacuum cleaner under her desk? She wanted to be ready in case any paper clippings escaped!
85. How does a secretary communicate with forest animals? She uses spell-check!
86. Why did the secretary bring a blanket to the office? She wanted to create a cozy work environment!
87. Why did the secretary bring a dictionary to her desk? She wanted to make sure she was spelling everything!
88. What did the secretary say to the pencil? “You’re write for the job!”
89. How does a secretary organize her recipes? She puts them in alphabetical order by ingredient!
90. Why did the secretary become a hairdresser? She wanted to add some style to her filing system!
91. How does a secretary prepare for a busy day? She does some “fax”ercise!
92. What is a secretary’s favorite type of clothing? Button-down shirts, because they make her feel “file” and organized!
93. Why did the secretary bring a fishing pole to work? She heard there were a lot of “inbox” trout!
94. How does a secretary make time fly? She sets the clock to “lunch break” mode!
95. What does the secretary say when she solves a difficult problem? “Staples! I’ve figured it out!”
96. How did the secretary become a magician? She can turn a messy desk into a clean and organized workspace!
97. Why did the secretary hang a map on the office wall? She wanted to plot her way through the day!
98. What do you call a secretary who loves to dance? A “filing” ballerina!
Church Secretary Jokes
99. Why did the church secretary become a detective? Because she was great at keeping tabs on everyone’s sins!
100. What did the church secretary say when asked how she manages the church budget? “With lots of prayers and a good calculator!”
101. Why did the church secretary get a promotion? Because she had divine organizational skills!
102. What’s the church secretary’s favorite font? “Times New Roman” Catholic!
103. How does the church secretary stay calm during a busy Sunday service? She knows it’s all in “holy” order!
104. What do you call it when the church secretary takes a vacation? A “holy-day” break!
105. Why did the church secretary bring a ladder to work? To reach the higher-ups, of course!
106. What’s the church secretary’s favorite kind of music? Hymns and “keyboard” classics!
107. How does the church secretary keep track of all the prayer requests? She has a direct line to the “prayer cloud”!
108. Why did the church secretary make a great detective? She could find the missing pews-ter!
109. What do you call a church secretary’s favorite snack? “Holy” guacamole!
110. How does the church secretary organize the choir practice schedule? She uses “harmony” calendars!
111. Why did the church secretary always carry a notebook? To jot down “sacred” notes, of course!
112. What did the church secretary say when asked about her favorite book of the Bible? “Excel-equations”!
113. How did the church secretary become a computer expert? She mastered the “divine” command functions!
114. What’s the church secretary’s favorite kind of tea? Sereni-tea!
115. Why was the church secretary good at planning events? Because she knew how to “pray” them together!
116. How does the church secretary stay calm during a crisis? She calls on the “holy” IT department!
117. What’s the church secretary’s secret talent? She can turn “paper” into “papyrus”!
Secretary Jokes One Liners
Bring some humor to the office with our secretary jokes and one liners. Discover lighthearted wordplay and relatable scenarios that will have secretaries and coworkers alike chuckling.
118. Why did the secretary take a ruler to bed with her? She wanted to measure her sleep.
119. What did the boss say to his secretary when she told him she was pregnant? “Congratulations! Now we know you’re not working too hard.”
120. Why do secretaries love Mondays? Because they can start their week with a clean slate!
121. What do you call a group of secretaries who meet up every day for lunch? A proofreading gang!
122. What’s a secretary’s favorite beverage? Times New Ro-Manhattan!
123. What did the secretary say when her boss asked her to fax some papers over? “Do you think the internet is out again?”
124. Why did the secretary cross the road? To get to the shredder on the other side!
125. How do you know when a
secretary is bored? She starts counting the staples.
127. Why did the secretary bring a parachute to work? Because she heard the boss was dropping a bombshell!
128. What’s the difference between a secretary and a typist? About five years.
129. Why do secretaries love baseball? Because it’s all about pitchin’, catching’ and filin’!
130. Why did the secretary hide her boss’s phone? She was afraid he’d take another “conference” call!
131. How do you get a secretary’s attention? You whistle and then yell, “Please don’t tell my wife!”
132. What do you call a secretary who always types in CAPS? The SHOUT-erbug.
133. Why do secretaries love jazz music? Because it’s all about timing, improvisation and rearrangement!
134. What’s a secretary’s favorite way to unwind after a hard day at the office? To take her boss out for a drink!
135. Why do secretaries make great chefs? Because they’re always chopping up documents!
136. What’s a secretary’s favorite quote? “Work smarter, not harder.”
137. Why did the secretary wear sunglasses to work? She didn’t want the boss to see her eye-rolling!
138. Why did the secretary stop wearing high heels to work? Because she wanted to avoid office politics.
Related: Office Knock Knock Jokes
Dirty Secretary Jokes
139. Why did the secretary bring a ladder to work? She wanted to reach new heights in her career.
140. How does a secretary like to organize their tasks? In alphabetical order, of course!
141. Why did the secretary bring a math textbook to work? She wanted to calculate the perfect schedule.
142. What do you call a secretary who is good at problem-solving? An administrative whiz!
143. Why did the secretary become a librarian? She loves keeping things organized.
144. What do you call a secretary who always has a solution? An efficient problem-solver.
145. Why did the computer ask the secretary for help? It knew she was skilled in technology.
146. How did the secretary win the employee of the month award? By balancing multiple tasks with ease.
147. What is a secretary’s favorite type of math ? Accounting, because it all adds up.
148. How does a secretary handle a stressful day? With patience and grace.
149. What did the secretary say to the stapler? “You’re the backbone of office organization.”
150. Why did the secretary become a detective? She can always find misplaced files.
151. How does a secretary stay organized during a busy day? By prioritizing and managing time effectively.
152. Why did the secretary bring a broom to work? To sweep away any potential problems.
153. What is a secretary’s favorite tool? A well-organized filing cabinet.
154. Why did the secretary become a comedian? She has a knack for lightening the office atmosphere.
155. How does a secretary keep calm during a hectic day? With deep breaths and a positive mindset.
156. What do you call a secretary who loves to multitask? A master of juggling responsibilities.
Related: Funny Receptionist Jokes
Some Final Thoughts
As we conclude our journey through this amusing realm of office humor, let’s remember to appreciate the camaraderie and the comic relief that humor provides in the workplace.
Secretary jokes allow us to take a step back, find the hilarity in the everyday tasks, and celebrate the resilience of those who keep offices running smoothly with a smile.