100 Hilarious Hand Puns and Jokes

Puns about hands are an endless source of laughter and fun – and even more so when you’re having a conversation with someone else who’s in on the joke!

Whether you’re talking about hands, fingers, palms, or wrists, there’s always something to be said about these fun-loving body parts. Here are a few of our favorite puns about hands to get you started.

Puns About Hands

When it comes to funny puns, hands don’t often get the credit they deserve. But puns about hands are surprisingly abundant and often very clever. Here are just a few of our favorites:

 accomplish more than one!”

“If at first you don’t succeed try, try again – all or nothing with both hands!”

A handshake is a polite high five.

You can’t have your cake and hand it too!

Your hands are always clapping when you’re happy

Don’t be afraid to lend a helping hand!

 I’m having a handful of puns.

This pun is straight from the wrist.

My hands are tied trying to come up with more jokes!

There’s always something in my hands when it comes to good puns.

Hand Puns About Love

If you’ve got a punny sense of humor, you’ll love these hilarious hands-on puns! Whether you’re exchanging funny hand jokes or just looking for a few puns to add to your repertoire, these funny puns about hands are sure to get a few laughs.

From the classic hand puns to the absurd, here’s a round-up of the best puns about hands.

“I’m in hand over heart with you.”

“My heart is at your fingertips.”

“My heart is in your capable hands.”

I’m totally “hand” in love with you!

You “hand” me my heart every time I see you.

Let’s “hand” in hand, walk the journey of life together.

You’re the missing “piece” of my puzzle, let’s “hand” in our love.

I’m “fingers-crossed” that we’ll be together forever.

You “hand” me my happiness every day.

I’ll never “let go” of your hand or our love.

Your love is like a “warm embrace” that I never want to let go of.

You “nail” my heart every time you smile.

You “grip” my heart and never let go.

I “thumb” through memories of us together and smile.

My love for you is like a “handprint” that can never be erased.

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When we’re together, it’s like our “fingers are intertwined.”

You “palm” my heart every time you say “I love you.”

Heart Puns About Hands

A bear’s paw is more than a handful – it’s an armful!

A sloth might not be the quickest animal in the woods, but boy does he have great bear hands!

“Hand what your heart desires!”,

“Hands on deck if you want to feel extra warm inside.”

My heart is in your hands!

You have my hand and my heart.

Beating around the bush has been giving me a headache lately.

I’m head over heels for you!

A beating heart is a handy thing to have!

Your hands and heart will always be in sync if you put your mind to it.

Hands help keep hearts warm during cold weather with hugs and cuddles!

My heart hands out love like it was Valentines Day treats!

I’m in a pickle because my heart is in two mitten-ders.

My heart goes crazy for good handshakes.

Let’s hold hearts, not grudges – that’s the way to really make your mark!

“My heart is in your hands.”

“I’m handing over my heart to you.”

Puns About Bear Hands

Whether you’re trading puns with friends or just looking for a few puns to add to your repertoire, these funny puns about hands are sure to get a few laughs. So, get your hands on these puns and start spreading the laughs!

 Bear hands are the paws-itive way to shake things up!

When you’re looking for a good grip, reach out and bear hug someone!

 If something’s too hard to hold onto, they say it’ll take two bears to get the job done right!

With its strong claws, every day is a “beary” gripping experience!

Bear handed punches are a real bear to deal with!

When bears extend their hands, it’s called…off-er pawises!

The bears always have the upper hand.

If you want to ‘bear hug’, make sure it’s a bearable amount.

Bears never have their hands full – they’ve got two palms and five claws!

“Shake it off? I’d rather bear hand it out instead.”

“Bear hand puns are paw-some!”

“Bears have the best grasp on humor.”

 The best part of being a Bear Hand is the paw palooza!

 When you cross a bear and a hand, it’s called a “Beand”!

 If you don’t mind getting your hands dirty, being a Bear Hand can be really rewarding.

 Bears may have bigger paws than we do, but that doesn’t mean they always win at hand games like

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rock-paper-scissors – only sometimes!

Puns About Cold Hands

 I tried to take a hot bath, but my hands got so cold it was more like an icicle shower!

When going outside with no gloves on in the winter its not a good idea– you might as well be bear-handed!

 Even if your hands are shivering in the cold weather don’t let them catch pneumonia – that’s just a way of saying ‘stay warm’!

 Don’t worry if you have cold hands, the warmth is just around the flounder!

I got nervous when my gloves had a hole in them – but it was only a handy situation after all!

 I heard other people at my ski resort talking about frozen fingers, but that’s not something to be fazed by!

Don’t just stand around with cold hands like a statue, be sure to keep them warm inside your pocket pod!

Jokes About Hands

Why did the hand go to the doctor? Because it was feeling a little unwell.

What do you call a hand that’s always angry? A fist.

Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything, including your hands!

Why did the hand get a ticket? For parking in a “no-palm” zone.

Why did the hand cross the road? To get to the other palm.

Why did the hand go to the beach? To get a little sand-hand therapy.

Why did the hand feel lonely? Because it had no one to hold.

Why did the hand get cold? Because it left its gloves at home.

What did one hand say to the other? “Don’t worry, I’ve got you covered.”

Why was the hand afraid of the clock? Because it was ticking.

What do you call a hand with a sense of humor? A palm comedian.

What’s a hand’s favorite type of music? Heavy metal.

Why did the hand go on a date with the clock? It was a hands-on experience.

Why did the hand break up with the watch? It couldn’t keep up.

Why did the hand feel embarrassed? Because it got caught in the cookie jar.

What do you call a hand that can play piano? A digital musician.

Hand Jokes One Liner

Why did the hand go to the doctor? Because it was feeling a little wistful.

Why was the hand afraid of the watch? Because it knew it was time to face the music.

What do you call a hand that’s always on time? A second hand.

Why did the hand cross the road? To get to the other wrist.

Why did the hand break up with the glove? It just didn’t fit anymore.

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What do you call a hand that’s good at poker? A full house.

Why do hands make bad musicians? They can’t keep a steady grip.

Why don’t hands like telling jokes? They always drop the punchline.

Why did the hand go on strike? It wasn’t getting a fair handout.

Why did the hand quit its job at the glove factory? It wanted a hand in designing.

What do you call a hand that’s always in trouble? A slap-happy hand.

Why did the hand get a tattoo? To give it some grip on life.

What do you call a hand that’s been bitten by a dog? A paw-ly hand.

What do you call a hand that’s always taking selfies? A camera-ready hand.

Why do hands like to dance? They’ve got beat in their palms.

What do you call a hand that’s been stung by a bee? A honey-dipped hand.

Why did the hand go to art school? To get a handle on its creativity.

Puns About Washing Hands

1. “Don’t be a soap-dropper, be a hand washer! Have a squeaky-clean birthday!”

2. “Wash your hands like you’re trying to scrub away bad puns. Happy birthday, you clean and clever soul!”

3. “It’s your special day, so lather up with happiness and wash away any worries! Happy birthday, you germ-fighting superstar!”

4. “I’m so good at hand-washing, I could win a ‘cleaning’ medal!”

5. “Washing hands: the best way to show germs the ‘clean’ getaway!”

6. “Soap and water are my dynamic duo for the fight against grime crime!”

Puns About Broken Hands

  1. “I guess you could say my high-five game is ‘handicapped’ right now.”
  2. “My broken hand has really ‘handed’ me a new perspective on life.”
  3. “Looks like I’ll be taking a ‘hand’s-on approach to healing.”
  4. “My plans for the week? Well, they’re a bit ‘up in the air,’ or rather, ‘up in a cast.’”

Puns About Broken Arms

  1. “Guess I’ll be ‘arm-wrestling’ my own limitations until this cast comes off.”
  2. “My art skills have reached a new ‘armature’ level due to this cast.”
  3. “Seems like I’m all ‘arm’ and no action until this fracture heals!”
  4. “Breaking news: I’ve become an expert at ‘forearm’ balancing.”
  5. “Who needs two arms when you can ’embrace’ the challenge of one?”

Also, check-out:

  • Funny Puns About Fingers
  • Cute Puns About Herbs
  • Best Puns About Onions
  • Clever Puns About Shadows
  • Hot Air Balloon Puns & Jokes
  • Digestive System Puns & Jokes
  • Bell Pepper Puns & Quotes

Conclusion

hands are often the source of some of the most creative puns and jokes. Whether you’re looking for an amusing pun or some clever wordplay, these puns about hands can provide a lighthearted moment of levity.

Whether you use them in conversations or just for a simple chuckle, these puns about hands are sure to bring a smile to everyone’s face.